
While there’s no doubt that courteous and well-mannered people move to the Land of Smiles, all it takes is one bad expat in Thailand to make us all look bad. Here are some of the cringeworthy things we’ve seen expats do during our time living in Thailand.
Representing Your Home Country Poorly
We’ve seen more than a few expats who forgot to leave their bad habits at Thailand’s borders. Things like regularly walking around in public dressed inappropriately (going shirtless; wearing cleavage-revealing tops or booty shorts; walking around barefoot) or getting drunk and purposefully picking fights, both which are no-no’s in Thailand. There are expats who spit excessively in close proximity to other people and lazily leave trash in public areas for others to clean up. We’ve even dined with expats who complain that the service isn’t up to par with Western standards. Well duh, we’re in Thailand.
Not only have these expats made themselves look like fools, but they’ve given the rest of us who haven’t forgotten our manners a bad name. Thai culture is generally accepting of foreigners but there are behaviors that are considered rude here. As an expat, it’s our responsibility to be aware of what is considered offensive now that we call Thailand our home.
Negatively Generalizing the Thai Locals
We’re pretty disgusted when expats say condescending things about Thais. Phrases like, “They’re just a bunch of blood suckers,” “They’ll take you for everything you have,” “Ignorant and lazy,” and our personal favorite, “Why can’t they just learn to speak English?”
Kudos to the Thai men and women who deal with foreigners’ poor attitudes day in and day out and keep those revered smiles on their faces. That bad expat in Thailand has clearly forgotten that he or she is a guest in this country. And as a (polite) guest, one doesn’t offend their host, right? And by all means, Thai people are about as polite as they come.
NOTE: If an expat has reached a point in his or her life where they are consumed by bitterness about their host country, it may be time to move on or, at the very least, learn how to forgive and forget. |
Never Learning the Local Thai Language
When moving to a new country, whether it’s for a year, five, or infinitely, isn’t it fair to put some effort into learning the language? There are expats in Thailand who know nothing more than “hello” and “thank you” in Thai but they’ve lived here for years. Where’s the ambition or sense of adventure?!
We’ve had our own struggles learning Thai and it’s not an easy language to learn. And with so many expats in Thailand, it’s definitely tempting (and quite easy) to settle into a clique and never learn to speak Thai. Plus it’s possible to survive in the major cities without using Thai, although in the countryside it’s an entirely different story.
Making an effort to learn Thai shows that, as expats, we care about the country we’re living in and we have pride in connecting with its people. Emotions aside, learning Thai is practical! Asking how much it costs to go to the airport or ordering drinks at a restaurant in Thai not only gives us a sense of independence, but gives the locals a good impression of us. Or at the very least, doesn’t give a bad one.
Not Taking Care of Your Health
Medical care is generally more affordable in Thailand than it is in Western countries. And there’s usually no language barrier or lack of training because many doctors speak fluent English and have been trained in modern medical practices. Even so, we’ve seen expats who’ve stopped taking care of their mental and physical well being since moving abroad.
We get it. Without preventative medicine culture biting at your heels, it’s easy to get out of a normal healthcare routine such as getting regular teeth cleanings or taking care of that weird toenail growth before it turns everything green and falls off. We’ve seen some wicked teeth (or lack thereof) and talons out there as proof. Other expats have a rough time living abroad, and without the proper friend and family support system, they don’t get professional help to treat their depression, anxiety, or anger problems.
So when expats stop doing routine check-ups or they completely forgo the doctor when their health starts to deteriorate, that’s a serious problem.
Chastising New Expats for Their Naivety and Eagerness
Sitting across a bar, we’ve overheard older men take younger guys under their wing and tell them how submissive or crazy Thai women are.
We’ve seen hardened ESL teachers scoff at the fresh ideas and enthusiasm of first-time teachers.
We’ve also heard lifers tell new expats that they’re crazy to live here and to go back to their home country while they still can.
While there’s a time and place for being bluntly honest, twisting or skewing information or completely shooting down another person’s dreams is pretty low in our books and a perfect example of being a bad expat in Thailand.
Resenting the Oddities of Thailand
It’s not uncommon to have single ply toilet on restaurant tables but have no TP stocked in the bathrooms. There are several Thai holidays in which alcohol sales are banned. And sometimes there’s a dual price system that charges more for foreigners than for locals. All of these can be quite frustrating for expats whose countries regularly stock toilet paper in bathrooms, always sell alcohol on holidays, and never discriminate on pricing.
To many expats, Thailand is full of oddities, but as the saying goes – This Is Thailand. Rather than fight it or whine about things we can’t control, go with the flow. Once expats learn to accept it as is (or come prepared by always carrying a packet of tissues), they’re in for a much more pleasant time in Thailand.
Spending as Little Money as Possible
Living is cheap in Thailand, which is why we’re confused when people get drawn into a lifestyle in which they begin to pinch pennies to the point of unhappiness and boredom!
We’ve overheard expats complaining about their 600 baht ($20 USD) electricity bill. We’ve read forums in which people moan about a 30% increase in fresh coffee prices, when in reality, their latte now costs 40 baht, up from 30 baht.
One reason why people come to Thailand is because the cost of living is so affordable and they can stretch their money. But living cheaply can backfire when all an expat does is hole themselves up and spend as little as possible. Yes, for some it’s about survival, but others it’s an obsession about the (low) dollar figure. In the end, most expats who do this will only experience unhappiness and loneliness in return.
Not Living Life to the Fullest
For heaven’s sake we’re in Thailand! We aren’t stuck in some dead-end job, or far worse, in an oppressed country where it’s not safe to go outside. Use this as an opportunity to explore different parts of Thailand and it’s neighbors in Southeast Asia. Thailand has everything from beaches to mountains and a constantly growing infrastructure.
For expats who have lost their way, a good place to start is thinking back to what attracted them to live in Thailand in the first place.
How to Not Be a Bad Expat in Thailand
To end on a positive note, we encourage everyone to be a good expat in Thailand. Here’s how:
Do you agree?
Some great points. ALL cultures are full of contradictions in terms of what might seem like common sense. You will see plenty of topless locals spitting like troopers… in their own back yard. You’ll see folk resting their feet up in the air, they just know where to aim them. If playing sports including footy and boxing, leave your manners at the door. We have reached a point now where we really need to start working with the Thai people to keep foreign relations good because the honeymoon is over and Thailand is no longer enamored by the new people… Read more »
How about the very poor character of expats in general that live in Thailand. Having livi\ed in other Asian countries as an expat for several years i can tell you Thaland seems to attract the worst expats. I have no problem with the Thai’s but have had many problems with expats, especially pimps who owns bars ( and there supporters ) who are the lowest qaulity expats of them all.
There are definitely pockets of bad expats, but luckily there are enough good ones around because that’s the crowd we hang with!
Adjusting and living local helps not only to lower cost but to experience what life is like for people in Thailand. Sometimes less is more and we achieve much happiness we never know.
It certainly gives a different perspective of what is important and what isn’t!
Thailand is a beautiful country whether its culture, food, people, places etc. Just like any other country has their culture and typical lifestyle. People just need to be open minded and learn other cultures instead of complaining and whining whats not on par with their country’s standards. we live what and where best for us and that should not allow people who bring us down just because they arent willing to jump out of their sh*it hole. all of us have choices in life and we decide whats good and best for us . I’ve lived in Thailand and i… Read more »
Once the honeymoon period is over, it’s easy fr an expat to become bitter about things he or she doesn’t understand or want to accept as is. There are many pros and cons to living in Thailande; obviously there are more pros in our opinion or else we would have moved on. We only suggest the same to everyone else so that their happiness is preserved.
Thanks for your comments:) It’s good to hear you like our angle.
Hi guys, I like your ideas and the website. I would propose to add to the good expat opportunity list : “take the opportunity to improve and to leave your bad habits behind” Leaving for another and different Country also means leaving social / peer pressure and the, for some a once-in-a-lifetime, chance to seek out an environment that is more stimulating than the one you leave behind. So many things to do, meet New (future) Friends, Learn about Culture, Language, Architecture, Nature, History and about many ages of peaceful co-existence between different religions and various ethnic groups. Also, further… Read more »
This should seriously be a required pamphlet for any expat and/or traveler entering Thailand. I am appalled by the vast amount of condescension from Westerners toward Thai people (mostly online commenters/keyboard warriors), generalizing Thais and talking down on us when we don’t do things the Western way. I often wonder why they’re still here if they express such discontent about Thailand and its people; or why not be part of the solution for their new ‘home’ instead of entitled whining. Thanks for understanding (and spreading) the beauty of humility and modesty, which takes a lot more depth, character, and strength… Read more »
Thank you Pai! It easy to throw around slurs, but we agree that it take more skill and maturity to hold your tongue at certain times or to express yourself in an agreeable manner at least. We really appreciate your comment, especially because you do see it from both sides. Have a great one!
Hi Chris and Angela,
Me and my girlfriend just returned back to Canada from a year living in Bangkok. I have been following your blog since we arrived in Thailand in 2014. Just wanted to say keep up the good work! I find your blog really interesting and relatable. It seems you guys really a good sense of living abroad. I agreed with all of the points in this particular post.
We plan on moving back to Asia in a year or two, until then, your blog will have to do!
Cheers!
Bailey & Stephanie
Bailey and Stephanie – Thank you kindly for taking a moment to write this! We’re glad to hear your Thailand experiences resonate with ours and that you share the same attitude about being good expats and representing yourself well. Keep it up and good luck on your next move to this side of the world. :)
Hi Chris & Angela. Ive been very quiet on the blog front recently, due to working here in BKK. The locals do have some oddities, sense of direction being one of them, I always walk quickly and have to dodge Thai’s changing direction! I’ve picked more Thai words on this trip, but still cannot string a conversation along, Google translate app on my phone helps a lot 555
Keep at it! That fact that you can pick up words in everyday conversation is impressive. And maybe the zigzag sidewalk walking is a Bangkok thing. We don’t get it much here, although there i a lot of zig zagging and weird “rule” breaking on the roads.
You live in CNX a tourist and ex-pat hotspot, try living in the more real areas of TH, you are safe in your westernised city I think. I agree with most of your post but not all, no matter how much you sugar coat your idea of an ex-pat life. I’ve been here 5 years, speak self taught Thai, Isan and some Lao – just in case you were thinking I’m some uneducated idiot on this subject, I’m not. What you did do very well is pinpoint the behaviour of the ex-pats who do act up and definitely give us… Read more »
We’ve visited, although never lived, in more rural areas of Thailand. We can only imagine the differences in what would define a bad expat outside the more Westernized cities such as Chiang Mai. Where ever you live in Thailand, the bottom line is to not let bitterness or even indifference eat you alive. Thanks for posting.
Excellent post, I could upvote it 100 times!
Haha, THANKS!
This is really great! Honestly, this is not my first time being a foreigner living in a country, but even I still have to catch myself sometimes. Yeah, they may not have TP or soap sometimes in the bathroom, I can take my own, so what?!
Even if you are not living in a different country and just going for a visit, you should still have respect and be courteous…why is that so hard for some?
We want to complain sometimes too (hey, we’re all human!) but the difference is how we handle the situation. We hold our tongues and don’t lament our sorrows and frustrations to the world. And no, it doesn’t hurt to carry around a little TP!
My first time having to “go” in an unfamiliar bathroom was just outside a roadside food court in CM. Not unpleasant, but simply not a Western experience.
I was expected to squat over a hole, and clean my bum with the rinse of a hose, and there was no soap or towels of any kind. This after paying (I think) maybe 5 Bhat for the privilege. An “eye-opener” for sure!
I learned to carry my own TP, soap and (paper?) towels. If I spoke more Thai, I would have asked what they provided for that 5 Bhat!. :-/
Running water? TP? Soap? Maybe that’s too much to expect in the LOS. Dunno.
Also – FWIW, and despite my previous comments…. Please – Anyone looking to visit Thailand… Don’t be put off by my comments as being negative. I’ve found 99% of Thailand the best experience I’ve ever had. I absolutely LOVE the beautiful country and people of Thailand.
It would be unrealistic if everything went right in Thailand :) As far as your first bathroom experience, if you live here long enough everyone has one of those! We had a good laugh and nod our heads in agreement with the 5 baht charge for…what? Obviously it’s for using their facilities, but please, throw in a square or two of TP for that!
This is such a good post. I see it all the time :-). First time was in Texas after moving from L.A, only we couldn’t buy alcohol on Sundays, drove around for ages before realizing something was amiss. I think ugly people are just that. They just take their behavior with them. I am struggling with Andalusian Spanish, but l still try. You’re right, if you have become disillusioned and bitter about your chosen host country, it’s time to go.
Unfortunately it happens all over the world. Thanks for being one of the good folks who takes a country’s (on in your case, state’s) differences in stride. Good luck on your Andalusian Spanish!
I hope I’m in the happy expat circle :) Also, true story, the other week I didn’t just see two Western travelers walking into 7-11 without shoes, but they then left on their MOTORBIKE barefoot. Stupid…
Uh definitely! That whole barefoot thing again… but on a motorbike? All we can say is road rash leaves a nasty scar!
This is a really good article! i wish expats in Indonesia will also read this. And we’ll appreciate it if you want to learn our language instead of demanding everyone to speak English. i’m also learning Japanese although i’m only gonna be here for less than 5 months :)
We feel the same way even in America, although arguably there is no declared language – not even English in the US- so maybe we shouldn’t be upset if immigrants (er, expats) from Mexico, China, India, etc don’t bother learning English and stick to the language they know best. But way to go for setting the right example and learning Japanese for your time over there! That’s gotta be challenging but you’re doing it. Keep it up!
I love this! Haven’t seen a post like this for ages. Well done! Makes me miss how lovely Thailand really can be, but also a harsh reminder about all the nasties you get there too.
It was meant to be be a fun read. Glad you liked it! Hope all is well in Spain!
Definitely agree with not learning the language. It’s crazy to me that people can move somewhere and not even make an attempt to learn at least a few more phrases. I’ve lived in a bunch of different countries now, and always try to learn the basics and more.
That’s even more of a challenge learning different languages if you’re bouncing around a lot like yourself. Have you ever just blurted something out in the wrong language? Once in a blue moon we’ll want to say something in Spanish!
You’re decent human-beings who knows how to look at things right. Bless you.
Thanks young. We hope to set good examples for other expats. Cheers!
good advice, I just stay away from expats for the most part and live the Thai life. I LOVE THAILAND.
We’re lucky to have our little circle of happy expats and don’t bother with those who bring us down. But that’s the type of friends to have anyways! Quality vs quantity.
Good article guys and very true. Being relative newbies in LOS (4 mths), we’ve experienced a lot of what was stated above. I think the majority of these ugly expats would also be ugly citizens in their own country. The veteran expat appears to get stuck in a rut for whatever reason and can’t get out of it. More than likely, the path of least resistance for them. Thailand is not perfect by any means, but so far it is enjoyable and we always remember that we are guests in their country and treat it as such. When we first… Read more »
We understand why Thailand attracts people who don’t have high income (if you only had $1000 USD a month, you certainly couldn’t live in Europe, right?) or those who feel they don’t fit in at home and want to start over. And it’s possible to fall into a rut here because it’s easy to isolate yourself. We’ve had our moments where we’ve been annoyed or frustrated, but luckily the good moments far outshine the bad ones. An those poorly translated signs… they’ll cheer anyone up!
Good stuff! This is one of the few articles I’ve read that seems to chime with my experiences living in Thailand. There’s often far too much negativity amongst us immigrants- come on guys, we live here by choice! Nowhere is perfect of course, but for me Thailand’s still a fantastic place to live.
Indeed we live here by choice an negativity never gets you anywhere. Glad you enjoyed the read!
Seems the TV forum is a haven for many disgruntled Expats. It’s a real shame.that expats have gotten such a bad reputation. Please don’t take my comments about the TV forum as mostly negative. Most TV members are very supportive of the Thai culture, etc. There are indeed some that prefer to continually give the Thais a bad name and complain. For shame! Thai folks are wonderful human beings. My Thai wife (of over 30 years) and I are living in the US. We have many Thai friends who have helped me become a bit more “Thai” – bless them.… Read more »
We used to be on it a lot, but now we don’t really go on ThaiVisa. There is good information to be found, but you have to rifle through so much negativity, criticism, and bad information that it’s not worth our time. Sometimes we catch ourselves wanting to comment back, but have to remind ourselves not to feed the trolls. But we do thank the forum members who genuinely put out good information.
That’s cool that you are active at your Thai temple in your US town and learning to write Thai. You’re wife must be proud :)
i really liked yr article. so true. we have been several times in thailand. hated hua hin and always liked chiang mai. thought of moving there and finally decided no. moved to porto portugal and love it here. will still come back to chiang mai on holidays. agrre on all yr points taken except the health issue. a decent health insurance at our age is extremley expensive, and increasing with age. only good one for europeans seems to be april (avril?), french. thanks for yr always interesting contributions! e auguri forbyr life in cm? and go and eat in”spoon the… Read more »
Age and current health conditions definitely drives up the price of health insurance, but at least many procedures cost less in Thailand than elsewhere, saving money in the long run. We’ve been to Spoon de Best. It’s not far from Chiang Mai Gate. The Bpoo Pad Pong Garee is one of our favorites.
Hi guys, when we were there last month for our vacation (getting our new house setup a little) we met some of our Moo Baan neighbor’s. Our next door neighbor is from Belgium , and all he did every time we seen him was complain about everything.. I told my wife that if he is so unhappy living in paradise he should just move back to Belgium..lol… The others we met were very nice and respectful of the Thai life and custom’s, I guess there’s always one bad Apple or Mango in a bunch lol Thanks, Ted
Haha, “one bad mango”. Don’t let him drag you down! Glad to hear the rest of your neighbors are welcoming and enjoy living in Thailand.
Ha! Nice post. We spent 6 months in Thailand last winter and honestly I don’t know if we’ve come across as many miserable expats as we’ve seen in Thailand. I sometimes think expats in Thailand get stuck there by economic circumstances (and the easy sex). Maybe they retire too early thinking that their money will go far and that Thailand is their idea of paradise – and then get seriously jaded when it doesn’t turn out that way. * as a side note, we wouldn’t settle in Thailand. I’ve travelled there 5 times as a tourist and it is a… Read more »
Thanks for commenting! We remember when you wrote your post about Hua Hin and were bombarded with bad comments. People get defensive if you don’t paint a pretty picture… or they tear you down when you do. At least you two recognized that Thailand was a fun place to vacation and not necessarily to live and moved on before you got jaded. Hope all is well in Mostar!